Friday, November 21, 2008

Cuz I could bottle that shit and be all rich and stuff.

Being a very hectic week here, I have had to do a lot more driving than usual. While out on the road dodging a charter bus that was changing lanes like he was driving a Mazda Miata, I realized that what is lacking in today's day and age is COMMON SENSE! Seriously. Get some. Better yet, I'll just bottle and sell that shit so I can get my unpoverty on.

I'm all for making people retake their driver's test every time the license comes up for renewal. Cuz some people? They would just never pass and at least it would legally get them off the road. I say legally even though you just know the dumbfucks would drive with out a license anyway. But I digress.

With all the extra driving I have been a little more stressed that I normally would, and while it makes for a great comedy routine to entertain my sister while she is trapped in a tiny hospital room, it makes me build up a bullshit intolerance. For everything. And everyone. Especially OLD FARTS!! Including the Fat Cranky Bastard I live with and the Batshit Crazy Nitpicky Mother.

Chip? Shoulder? Have you met?

Not that I am an ageist.

But old people are buggin' the shit out of me right now.


Busy Bee Suz said...

I agree...but I don't know if age has anything to do with it....bad drivers are born everyday!!
You totally have to start your own dictionary. just today I have learned 2 new words from you:
Unpoverty and Multislacking.
If can come up with some genius words!!!!

Feisty Irish Wench said...

OK, I think you should be dubbed the "Bard of the Blogs" because you're making up words left and right lately and trying to be all Shakespearean on us. Cut it out will ya? You're making me look bad. Wait, nevermind, this crap is very entertaining.

The Girl Next Door said...

Hospital Entertainment Indeed! and I'm with Suz, you have taught me many new words - my favorite-est being "f'tard." Awesome.

One Reader said...

I will totally design the bottle for this Common Sense you speak so highly of. I can only assume we need some here because the driving is sucking! Also you may want to branch off into Manners in a box or something, cause rudness is flourishing.